Ego Suave

I'd like to present a new category of heartbreakers; more concrete than our beloved imaginary fellows, more trendy than the always interesting McNerdy, and disgustingly more moody than any McDreamy gracing my presence. This subset of male takes romance seriously, but can't pay the bill at the end of the night. This moocher behavior is only right in his mind, for he is an unpublished writer... An Artist! Supporting himself with a dead end part-time job would only cause him to fester in the open sore of regular, uninspired society. This male makes up for his complete inadequacy in every day life by being a self-righteous egotist concerning his intelligence. He wants to be successful and capable but struggles to actually work for those characteristics.

Unfortunately, his attractive features, including eyes, smile, and romanesque physique complicate the situation. His romantic nature and absolute love for cuddling and holding hands don't help either. As a boyfriend, this inadequate self-righteous egotist is perfect. He intelligently thinks through most problems and deeply understands feminine nature. His support and encouragement are endless. Yet, they ended.

I'm sure the reader recognizes a ranting woman when they read one. After a sudden and unexpected let go by the above described, I'm entitled to rant (and cry and sob, be moody and unpredictable, underfeed and overly drink). The egotist has a habit of complete devotion for one year- then quickly exiting the premises. In this case it lasted a year and a few months, but I wasn't counting. His impossible nature only makes me sigh (sob) now in remorse.

So ladies, when ego suave catches your eye at a bar or party and romances the hell out of you with wit and good looks, smile and tell him your interest lies elsewhere. If you feel yourself getting pulled into paying for a drink, a meal, or his rent, laugh and say 'good luck with your art'! Sport your independence and strength like you are an american gladiator. Keep your money in your red white and blue onesy while you're at it. Then go flirt with the sexy and interesting friends he attracts!