As we have all gotten a year older in the past few months, some of us (i.e. Violet) are really feeling the pressure. You know the pressure. The pressure to convert to a Smug Married. The pressure to dress your age, start a career, move out of your parents' basement. The pressure to pop out a couple of kids. The pressure to stay in a loveless marriage because you got married out of desperation and peer pressure, yada, yada, yada. To avoid these pressures myself, I'm keeping clear of age-appropriate-financially-stable-yuppies. No, sir. I'm sticking with the youngin's.
As I've mentioned before, Conrad IV is a few years younger than me. When we first started spending time together, he down played the age difference. "It's not even 3 years, it's actually 2 years and..10 months" he would say. Now that he's got me he will take any opportunity to point out how old I am. He even told me his mother was glad he was spending time with an "older and more mature woman." In three years, this will bother me, right now--not so much. So what if he's barely legal. So what if he's still in school and makes no money. So what if the slightest sign of commitment freaks him the hell out. Fine by me!
This, however, is not my first thing for a kid. Last summer, I totally had a thing for an 18-year-old intern. Then there's Emmett, who is still as fine piece of eye-candy as ever (and he's almost 21!). I'm not going to lie, sometimes I ask him to lift things for me or reach things off the upper shelves (and hell yes, I check out his ass). Obviously you can see a trend.
Ok, so maybe I'm a cougar in training, but I can see the appeal. They're hot, young and full of energy. And they don't want commitment. Perfect! Just wait. In three years, when I should be feeling the pressure to conform/move out of my parents basement, I'll be booking my annual cougar cruise.
As sexy as that sounds, maybe the pressure is getting to me. I recently had a dream that my mother kept nagging me to try on a wedding dress. After putting up quite a fight, she finally won and I tried it on. It looked stunning. As Violet and I believe that all dreams have meanings, she thought this meant I wanted to get married (Eeek!). When I asked Conrad what this dream could mean, he said, "You're old and you should seek older men." Thanks, kid. That's the spirit.
1 comment:
Oh, how I love being called out as the elder tribeswoman of this blog.
And I don't really believe that all dreams have meaning. Mainly because if they did, I would have to be committed. And a cougar cruise? Do they have a sugar daddy cruise?
Post a Comment