S.A.D. Mission: Impossible

Grayer is going out on a Valentine's Day (S.A.D.) pub crawl on Saturday, and in honor of the occasion, she asked me to make her a goal for the evening. With that, I had a pure stroke of genius, and offered to make her a SCAVENGER HUNT; a list of things to see and do for the evening. I think this is sure to become a tradition for future commercial holidays and vacations.

Grayer, here is your mission, if you choose to accept it...

• Complete a mad libs with random strangers (then share it with us)
• Acquire a condom from a stranger (not the machine in the bathroom)
• Find a mullet (we'll be needing photographic evidence)
• Have a bartender create a shot/drink just for you
• Find a person wearing pink panties
• ...and a man with cartoons on his boxer shorts
• Acquire the autographs of the following:

1. A firefighter
2. Celebrity (You won't be able to find Ben Affleck or Jennifer Garner. They're both here in Atlanta.)
3. A non-U.S. citizen
4. A Boston native

• Acquire 5 phone numbers from attractive young men
• Give out your phone number at least once
• Get the sob story of someone who has just been dumped
• Sing a duet (there must be an audience)
• Convince someone you are British (obviously don't show them this list)
• Convince someone you are building a DNA machine

And that should a good evening make.