Happy Birthday, Grayer

Today is Grayer's birthday. (So everyone should wish her a Happy Birthday.) Another year older, and STILL single. Inching closer and closer to spinsterhood. (tick, tock...) And hey, you've already got the cat! I say this dripping with sarcasm of course, only because I know that there are smug marrieds out there making ridiculous statements like that. (That and Grayer is the youngest member of the WWBD? team. If she has already reached spinsterhood, I may as well just hang up my ovaries and call it a day.)

And if you were Bridget, you would not only be thinking about how everyone else has crossed over to The Dark Side (i.e. become a smug married), but also be stressing about how to celebrate. Dinner party? Out to a restaurant?

Oh God. What to do? Wish had not been born but immaculately burst into being in similar, though not identical, manner to Jesus then would not have had to have birthday. Sympathize with Jesus in sense of embarrassment he must, and perhaps should, feel over two-millennia-old social imposition of own birthday on large areas of globe.

So don't feel guilty about the fact that other people are calling, sending you cards, or even gifts (I hope you like mine), but instead enjoy it. And when the parentals and unpleasant aunts sing to you over the phone, just roll your eyes and tune them out until the awkwardness goes away. Unless, of course, they sing to you in person, then grit your teeth and smile. It only lasts 30 seconds. Not only will I not sing to you, but I will eat a piece of cake, or some ice cream, or maybe even both, just for you.