The (Mini) Conversation

The White Horse is in Italy for 5 days. This sucks but on the plus side I can catch up on the sleep I've been deprived of lately, make it in to work early to get things done, and I need time to move house.

As great as things are going with TWH I feel it is starting to get to that stage where we may need to have The Conversation. Which is never fun now is it?

Part of me is wondering if it's too soon to even consider having The Conversation, in fact it is, because we've only been seeing each other for 3 weeks. And I have a serious habit of falling too hard too fast and I don't want to make that mistake again. But then, it's not like we have only known each other for 3 weeks, we've been friends for quite a few months. Dilemma.

I was doing fine and not really caring about all of the 'where is this going'? nonsense. Very unlike me, but it turns out, I can be fairly mellow and relaxed. But then the other night I was round his, he was packing to go on holiday and I was a little bored. His laptop was turned on and I decided I could use my time wisely and email Vi. I asked if I could check my emails and he said I could. Except I forgot that when it's your computer you don't bother about passwords and logging in, so when I typed in gmail, his email account automatically started loading. And I wasn't fast enough to stop it. But as soon as I could I logged off. Not before seeing that he had quite a few emails (unread, I hasten to add) from match.com.

Now, I need to stress that I am not freaked out by the fact that he is signed up to a dating site. In fact, I seem to recall him mentioning that at some point. Nor do I think that he should've deleted his profile straight after he and I started, well, whatever we started. I only just got round to deleting my online profile a month or so ago. And the emails were all unread.

No, what (accidentally) seeing those emails meant was that I started thinking about where things are going. Not in a dramatic fashion but more so in a 'are we exclusive'? type fashion. And the thing is, seeing those emails made me realise, because I hadn't really thought about it before, that I would quite like it if I was the only girl he's seeing. And that it really sucks him being away for 5 days. Just because I'm moving you understand, I could've put him to work.

I think the signs that we're exclusive and that things are going well are all there:
* I got introduced to some of his friends on Sunday
* When we were talking to his friends about the whole working together thing, he said that we were 'seeing each other'
* I spend about 3 nights a week at his
* He suggests meeting up more so than I do
* He emailed me at work today to let me know that his phone doesn't work in Italy but that he got there and that he can't wait til next week when he gets to see me. He's in Italy. I'd be focusing on the pizza, but I'll take it.

So I don't think having The Conversation would be terribly painful but it's too soon. I'm happy for things to continue as they are, but as I said, it's the 'exclusive' issue, I'm not saying we have to do the whole boyfriend/girlfriend thing. So, it's too soon for The Conversation but maybe we need to have The (Mini) Conversation? I hate this. Help.