Butt out

I've got a bone to pick with...well, just about everyone I've talked to in the last several weeks. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, is asking the million dollar question: What are you and the cute neighbor going to do when he moves? It's not always phrased like this, but that's the gist of it. And here's the answer: We don't know. And a follow-up question to you: Do we have to know right now?

The cute neighbor and I have been together for about 7 or 8 months, and while that is not an insignificant amount of time, I just don't feel like we have to have our future together completely mapped out. Then when I tell people I want to go to grad school, they assume I'm going to follow the cute neighbor to grad school. Um, no. Then when I say I want to go abroad to grad school, they say, "What does the cute neighbor think of this?" To which I'm always tempted to say "Who cares? The last time I checked, I didn't need his permission to do what it is that I need to do." But I refrain. I mean, I do care, because I care about him, obviously, but my point is I cannot revolve my future around anyone else but me at this point.

Let's say I follow him to wherever he goes. I enroll in grad school. We break up. I am left heartbroken and alone in a city where I don't know anyone and never really wanted to be in the first place. I will regret not doing my own thing for the rest of my life.

Let's say I follow him to wherever he goes. I enroll in grad school. We don't break up. Instead, we live happily ever after with 2 children, a dog, a cat, two goldfish, and a white picket fence. I will still regret not taking the opportunity to study at the school of my choice for the rest of my life.

If it was meant to be, one year apart won't ruin it. (However, open-ended long-distance will never, ever work if you want my advice.) If it wasn't, we'll both move on. Why does everyone need to put pressure on the relationship to last forever? Is it because I've now reached the ripe-old age of 28 that if it doesn't last forever it's a failure? I'm getting really sick of people putting pressure on our relationship. If we're not worried about it, then you shouldn't be either.

If I'm following anyone, it's Fenella, seeing as my current plan is to study in Europe. That, however, is not a problem. You see, boys will come and go. But Fen and I are forever.