If you're one of those people who has never dated online, you're pretty much missing out. I'm going to share some secrets with you. Sometimes, when on such a classy establishment as OkCupid, you get messages that can only be considered a gift due to the profile that it leads to (And sometimes the message itself is a gift, check out this site for endless examples). A "Hey there pretty smile, I think we'd have a lot in common" and a 47% match/47% enemy rating makes me whole-heartedly interested (I want to date a "bad" match just to see how bad it is). The below is taken directly from a profile of a 21 year old who messaged me. I have a feeling this guy is right up there with the thigh guy.
Self Summary
NOTE: I do not date thin or skinny girls. I prefer girls with meat on them, but not too much. Proportional. HOWEVER, if you are a full-figured girl I will give you a chance to persuade me. There are plenty of full-figured girls out there with big curves up-top and a manageable middle curve. I WILL NOT DATE anyone who: uses drugs, smokes, drinks more than socially, has any kids, has not gone beyond high school or is otherwise in a dead-end life.
That being said, I am a very caring, devoted, fun-loving person who give his all to make a relationship work but, I need to know that you will do the same. I can like you, love you and devote my entire life to you but I will not waste my time if I do not feel you are equally connected to me. I'm looking for a real girl who is more than just what appears on her profile. I need to be attracted to her both intellectually and physically for anything to spark between us. I know what I'm looking for, and I AM living proof that chivalry is not dead. The greatest gift you could ever give me is your love and I wish to receive that gift everyday. I just want you to know, whoever you are that I will be there for you in any way you need. Not simply to calm you down, but because I care about you and cannot be happy until I know that you are too.
I have been involved in community volunteer work for about ten years. I am also passionate about improving the environment and making sure it is safe for future generations.
Please send me a message if you are interested in me or not. Also, if you are not interested and I have favorited you, kindly provide an email saying why you don't think we'd make a good match. Again, chivalry is not dead, remember that
That being said, I am a very caring, devoted, fun-loving person who give his all to make a relationship work but, I need to know that you will do the same. I can like you, love you and devote my entire life to you but I will not waste my time if I do not feel you are equally connected to me. I'm looking for a real girl who is more than just what appears on her profile. I need to be attracted to her both intellectually and physically for anything to spark between us. I know what I'm looking for, and I AM living proof that chivalry is not dead. The greatest gift you could ever give me is your love and I wish to receive that gift everyday. I just want you to know, whoever you are that I will be there for you in any way you need. Not simply to calm you down, but because I care about you and cannot be happy until I know that you are too.
I have been involved in community volunteer work for about ten years. I am also passionate about improving the environment and making sure it is safe for future generations.
Please send me a message if you are interested in me or not. Also, if you are not interested and I have favorited you, kindly provide an email saying why you don't think we'd make a good match. Again, chivalry is not dead, remember that
What I’m doing with my life
Right now I am taking time off from school to volunteer at my local hospital. I needed to take this break for personal reasons, and will let you know why if I feel close enough to you.
The first things people usually notice about me
I am very quiet at first, but that's usually a sign of me crafting something to say. Sometimes I'm sneaky with my quietness. I'm always the guy that people can hang out with, and will stay with a person well after a party is over to so that he/she can let out some steam. Other than that, I have good tastes and my voice can sometimes veer towards monotone
You should message me if
...you're a curvy cutie who knows about what's going on in the world. I'm attracted to girls who like to have fun, but also take time to admire the simple things in life. Intelligence and physical fitness are must haves for me.
NOTE: I realize curvy can be a confusing term. I'm looking for a girl who has big curves up top, and less so a curve in the middle. Well-endowed, if you will.
Dear Mr. Curve Hugger,
Thanks for the message. I really like quiet guys who speak in monotone. It's great that you've been volunteering full time since you were 11, I'm sure your mother (whom I assume you still live with) is very proud of you. I'm assuming you messaged me because of window shopping my pictures. Yes, I do have curves on top as you may see, but you should know that I was wearing Spanx in those pictures, therefore my middle curves may be larger than they appear. In my opinion they are "manageable" but I'm not sure if you'd agree, curvy is a confusing term, but I'd like to think I'm well-endowed? Maybe I can send you my measurements and you can decide for yourself. Look forward to hearing from you.
Grayer
NOTE: I realize curvy can be a confusing term. I'm looking for a girl who has big curves up top, and less so a curve in the middle. Well-endowed, if you will.
Dear Mr. Curve Hugger,
Thanks for the message. I really like quiet guys who speak in monotone. It's great that you've been volunteering full time since you were 11, I'm sure your mother (whom I assume you still live with) is very proud of you. I'm assuming you messaged me because of window shopping my pictures. Yes, I do have curves on top as you may see, but you should know that I was wearing Spanx in those pictures, therefore my middle curves may be larger than they appear. In my opinion they are "manageable" but I'm not sure if you'd agree, curvy is a confusing term, but I'd like to think I'm well-endowed? Maybe I can send you my measurements and you can decide for yourself. Look forward to hearing from you.
Grayer
2 comments:
Happy Belated Birthday! Glad you got your birthday booty - you deserve it.
First of all, thank you for linking back to my online dating Hall of Shame. Honestly, I had forgotten that had ever happened to me. Second, I really love your response to the curvy man. Who does this douche think he is?
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