I am of the belief that you can relate most situations in life to something that happened in 'Friends'. I'm sure someone this very moment is doing a thesis to prove this very idea. Remember when Rachel puts Monica in charge of her love life? Rachel has to do whatever Monica says. I'm Rachel. I need a Monica. As I am in no position to be making these types of decisions by myself.
It all began back when I started my job. My office is hardly brimming with good looking, single, funny men. Which was kind of a relief, office romances are messy after all. However, there was once guy who intrigued me. Vi and I call him Posh Work Guy. Posh Work Guy is like no guy I have ever met before, and not really in a good way. He's posh and as I mentioned before, I'm not a fan of posh British guys. He has slight OCD and an obsession with using hand sanitiser. He's so ridiculously well-dressed people wonder if he's gay. And he's just not my type. At all.
He also keeps himself to himself. Barely anyone in the office knows anything about him. I only really got chatting to him a couple of months ago when we were all at the pub. After chatting to him for well over 20 minutes I heard him mutter to someone else: "Is her name Fenella?" Huh. Charming. A couple weeks later we were at the pub again (leaving drinks, a lot of people have left) and he got chatting to me and my friend from work, Emily. Now Emily and Posh Work Guy are more on the same wavelength 'posh wise' then I am. So they got on quite well. I actually knew beforehand that PWG had a bit of a thing for Emily, which I mocked him for. (He also was in a relationship at the time). A couple days later PWG asks if Emily and I want to go out with him that night to this club which is for members only. I couldn't go because I had a date but I ended up meeting them later. It was one of the most random nights in London I've had so far, but in a good way.
So Emily and I somehow slipped through these walls he puts up to other people at work. Apparently we should feel privileged. He made an attempt to ask Emily to dinner but got the hint that she wasn't interested. Meanwhile, he and I email all the time at work. He says that I keep him from going crazy with boredom. I just like getting non-work related emails. He says that Emily is cold, I'm friendly. Earlier this week he suggested we go for drinks after work on Friday. I agreed because I'm broke from my trip to visit Vi and he's not. Plus, as quirky and strange as he is, he's fun to hang around with. The evening started out perfectly innocent and normal. We drank, we chatted, we devised a plan to get the 34 year old guy we work with who still lives with his parents, laid (he really needs it). It was fun. We decided to go on to the club we went to before. The evening turned slightly sour when I realised that my wallet had been taken from my bag. It had been handed in at the bar, minus all my cash.
Even when we were at the club I never thought anything was going to happen. But I'm sure you all guessed where this is going. One moment we're chatting, the next, we're kissing. We went back to his place where after some fooling around I said:
"Well I think that's our friendship ruined."
He said:
"Eh, we weren't that close anyway."
IT'S FROM FRIENDS!!
This morning didn't result in any weird awkwardness, in fact, it was much the same as the night before. We did have the whole discussion about telling people at work. Which neither of us have any plans to do. I personally would never live it down because of the reputation he has. He just wants to protect his privacy. He drove me home (no small thing considering he lives in north London, I live in the south). And that was that. He text me a few hours ago, I replied.
It's safe to say that I now feel like a bit of an idiot. This was such a bad idea. Not 24 hours before all this happened I emailed Vi saying that I was staying away from guys for awhile why I learn or attempt to learn, not to fall so hard so fast. I was serious about it. I also blogged about my loss of mojo. Well that's out the window because I found it last night. All of this with a guy who is so not my type, is slightly shorter than me, at one point liked my friend, has a complicated situation with his ex and who I actually have no interest in at all. Oh and let us not forget...we work together.
Now accepting applications for the post of Monica.
3 comments:
I WANT TO BE YOUR MONICA!
Actually, I already am Monica. Think about it: I'm bossy, I'm irrationally competitive, and I'm currently sleeping with my neighbor, only none of our mutual friends know about that yet. (Not that we're trying to keep that a secret or anything, but as far as I know, we haven't gotten around to telling them about it yet.) Taking a look at my bedroom right now, however, will prove that I am anything but neat. But I have all the other bases covered.
As far as this incident goes, the amount of time it's been since you've last gotten some is directly proportional to the size of the mistake you make. But you did just get some from McNerdy, so I'm not sure how that fits in. Blame it on the alcohol. Yes, the alcohol is always a good culprit.
Does McNerdy count as it was in another country & time zone? I'm just trying to justify it more in my head...
You know you can be my Monica but we can't phone each other which is a major problem.
Alcohol is always the culprit. I never learn.
I don't think using your completely-not-my-type-co-worker to get back into the swing of things is a bad thing. Action is action afterall.
And you are completely right about everything somehow relating to a Friends episode. Just last week I found myself at work counting out the days to my coworker "Monday one day, Tuesday two day, Wednesday what? No! Thursday!!" Sadly he did not get this, but it helped me with my scheduling.
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