Scarlet's 2010 New Year's Resolutions

I will...

• Be more confident.
• Be more optimistic.
• Quit my job and find something that makes me happy. (If new boss is inappropriate, I will follow those old commercials and tell said boss "This is sexual harassment and I don't have to take it!")
• Take my dog on more walks as they are mutually beneficial. (Sub goal. Teach dog to pick up hot guys for me. Old men in pickup trucks blowing kisses at my dog do not count.)
• Make an effort to be more healthy by getting more sleep and exercising regularly.
• Develop inner poise and authority and sense of self as woman of substance, complete without boyfriend, as best way to avoid obtaining an imaginary boyfriend.

I will not...

• Regret quiting my job.
• Date guys after I have determined that I'm not that into them, as my time is v. valuable.
• Worry about becoming an old maid. Instead, I will enjoy the freedom of being a singleton!
• Have an imaginary relationship but instead learn from my experience.
• Allow my dating anxiety and fear of disappointment to prevent me from getting some action in 2010!

Happy 2010!!

I don't normally make resolutions. But there's no harm in trying. So, in 2010:

I will...

- Visit Violet. It's been over a year since we've seen each other, that's a year too many!

- Follow 'The Four Man Plan' (sub resolution- read 'The Four Man Plan'. It's on my nightstand). Here's to finding Mr. Right Now(s)!

- Embark on some form of exercise, form TBC.

- Get up 20 minutes earlier to improve on my current beauty routine of mascara and lipgloss.

- Cook (sub resolution- learn how to).

I will not...

- Read too much into the situation with Welsh Willy (or other). Instead will enjoy fun evenings for what they are, rather than hope something more will come of it.

- Keep telling myself that I'm rubbish at my job and quake inwardly whenever my boss asks me to do something.

- Leave my make-up on when I go to bed as results in IES (icky eye syndrome).

- Eat toast for dinner (more than twice a week).

- Drunk dial or drunk text. Anyone. Drunk dialing/texting reeks of desperation. Will be cool aloof ice queen instead.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

2010: Bring it on!

Ross: I'm gonna go out on a limb and say, "No divorces in '99! Whoo!"
Rachel: But your divorce isn't even final yet.
Ross: Just the one divorce in '99! WHOO!
-Friends, "The One with All the Resolutions"

As it is the last week of 2009, it's time for us to make our New Year's Resolutions for 2010. We had a pretty good year resolution-wise in 2009, although some of us did better than others. Let's all go out on a limb and say, "No imaginary relationships in 2010! Whoo!"

The Prosthetist

I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season and thinking about your new year's resolutions! Violet and I have been spending some serious family bonding time this week at our parents. This bonding time includes a Next Top Model marathon (Girl, that was fierce!), playing cards, watching movies, readings of Nightlight (a Twilight parody) and an intense game of family ping-pong, which lasted 5 sets and me almost cracking my head off the table (Damn you, new slipper socks on tile flooring!). Oh, and Vi, if you don't work on your forehand for next year, I will be asking for a trade.

I take a pause in this blog writing session as my mother leans over my chair wanting to see what I'm up to. Quickly switching to my other tab, as I have come to expect this, she makes me scroll slowly through my FB Home wanting to see "what's new on Facebook" before requesting to see my page. Again.

Anyways, Violet and I went out last night. Yes, Violet actually went out in our hometown! Not sure if she actually enjoyed herself, but, she did meet the subject of this post, The Prosthetist. The Prosthetist is a guy I know through my friend Greenley (He's actually been in love with her for I don't know? 5 years?). He lives 2 and 1/2 hours from me, which is conveniently located directly on my way back to our hometown. In August, I actually tagged along with him on a trip home. After driving 10 hours alone together in a pick up truck with no A/C, we got to know each other better. And of course, we talked of Greenley. He's a super nice guy, cute, has a beard, comes from a good family and will make very good money in the near future (As a prosthetist, obviously). Last night, he came out to meet Greenley and I. We exchanged pleasantries and updates, and talked about me visiting him during my upcoming vacation time (i.e. unemployment). He agreed to give me snowboarding lessons and visit me if I moved to the city. Violet and The Prosthetist chatted frequently as neither of them knew many of the people we were with. Shortly after Vi took off, he did too, telling him to call me if I needed a ride home. He's a nice guy like that.

Then he ruined it. About 20 minutes after leaving he started texting me. And through that conversation he started coming on to me. Coming on strong. It wasn't subtle, he is obviously not a student of the art of flirtexting. Thinking that maybe this was a result of the few beers he had been drinking, I kind of went along with it, as I had been drinking beers too. It wasn't until this morning when I looked back at what he sent me and realized how forward and awkward it was. And then he texted me today. Apologizing for what he said last night, but that he still meant the context of it. And that when I stop by and see him on my way back up North, maybe I can stay and hang out a while? Oh goodness.

This is just another example of how boys ruin everything. What am I supposed to do now? I can't visit him/get snowboarding lessons without it being awkward. As now he is clearly into me. Has he realized that if he can't have Greenley, he could just go for her best friend, the next best thing? Ugh. Boys ruin everything.

Normality has been restored

After a strict talking to from various friends, and Grayer's comment, I have thankfully realised that my behaviour towards the whole WW situation was uncalled for. I blame the fact that it's Christmas and the fact that last Saturday I was stuck at a Christmas party full of smug-marrieds. This was bound to affect my sanity.

However, I am pleased to report that I am going to take Grayer's advice and just enjoy last week for what it was and no more.

Now I really should get back to work before I get fired for not actually doing any work!

Merry Christmas to my fellow bloggers across the pond!!

xo

Fen

2009 Year's Progress: Scarlet

Despite all the doom and gloom of my recent posts, looking back I think that I've grown a lot over this past year (and certainly got more action than I even dreamed to hope for). I made some wicked awesome new friends. I went on a lot of dates (some excellent with unexpected arrivals, some accidental and some not so fab). Kissed some toads (OK a toad...apologies to the Engineer). Went on several holidays. And had my heart broken. So here is a review of my New Year's Resolutions.

I will not…

• Sulk about having nothing to do, but instead make more friends in my local area so that my social schedule is full. Excellent work! I embraced this New Years Resolution so much that at times I felt my social schedule was too full. If there were middle class socialite, I think I have earned the title. 1 trillion points (Hoorah!)
  
• Let my singleton status prevent me from going on a proper holiday. I went on two vacations and a mini-break to visit Violet. I am also indulging some time off to enjoy the holidays next week. Who needs a guy to take take a proper holiday? 2 million points (v.g.)
  
• Accept male fuckwittage silently, but instead address fuckwittage in a mature and composed manner. I guess I faltered a little with this one by keeping MM around. However, I did call him out when he was being a fuckwit. So I believe that I followed this one in the spirit that it was written. (Unfortunately addressing fuckwittage do not equate to fuckwittage eradication.) 10 points (poor)
  
• Have unrealistic expectations about men. Oops. Maybe next year? Then again maybe my expectations were actually too low. (I will never again agree to go to a sporting event with a man around my birthday. IT IS A TRAP!!) It's a wash...0 points (poor)
  
• Have a tantrum when my father indicates that I am to blame for my singleton status, but rather discuss the topic like a mature adult. Representing the rights of all singletons! My mom forbid my dad from talking to me about dating or grandchildren, thereby excusing me from this resolution. Although my dad did find other ways to tell me. one million points to my mom and 5 points to my dad for stealth


• Settle on a man simply get my father to stop complaining about how he will never have grandchildren. More of a lifetime goal. As I'm still a singleton, I think we can safely say that I've succeeded on this one. (I'm confident that I would have gotten rid of the Engineer eventually. Seriously. How long can you really date a guy that doesn't clean up immediately after his giant dog pees in the house?) 999 points for the continued effort (Hoorah for singletons!)
  

I will…

• Go on a second date. I clearly rocked this one! This resolution seems silly now, but in 2008 I assure you it seemed realistic. Special thanks to The Engineer for being the first to make this possible and ending my three year drought. a gizillion points to me and an honorable mention to The Engineer (v.v.g.)


• Form a stable relationship with a male of the non-fuckwit variety. Ugh. The world wasn't built in a day. I had first imaginary relationship with MM. I fell hard. On the plus side, now I know what really excellent chemistry feels like. And while it was imaginary, it lasted longer than any of the other guys I have dated. 100,000 points for the relationship, -50,000 points for the imaginary component
  
• Actively pursue new job opportunities in which I will not dread going to work everyday. Putting in my 2 weeks notice in January and going back to school!! Hoorah!! One billion points for me, negative points to the economy (v.v.g.)


• Be happy for my non-singleton friends but not hesitate to object to smug married comments from friends and family. It is starting! Several of my friends got engaged this year. As my heart was breaking, I tried on my first bride's maids dress and observed happpy couples complete with PDA, while pretending that all was right with the world. I'm just going to give myself this one. 1,000 points (v. good effort.)

An excellent year's progress!

I don't believe in resolutions: Grayer

Hmmm..so I did not live up to the stellar resoluting power of Violet. In my defense, I never said I believed in them in the first place. I just made them because everyone else was.

I will...

Graduate. A great big HOORAH for this one. I am officially a Master of Science in Microbiology (Can I get a whoop whoop!). It did take me longer than expected but I got it done with several weeks left in the year of 2009. Let us dwell on this achievement. 1 thousand million points

Learn to play the guitar. Last January I could successfully tab out On Top of Old Smokey. That was my greatest accomplishment and I haven't touched it since. This is a shame as I had many plans to woo many a men with my mad skillz and sultry singing voice. Oh well. 10 points (because Smokey was at least recognizable).

Meet friends outside of work. Although I've made many friends this year, they all are somehow related to work. On the bright side, at least I made friends outside of my department, and this is a very important step, although they are all still dorky scientists. 50 points

I will not...

Have any sort of imaginary/pseudo/fictitious/mythical relationship. Ooops. I did really well with this until Conrad showed up. At least this time I knew what I was getting myself into, and...well..ok that makes it worse. Negative 2 hundred thousand million points


Total points: ....like I said, I don't believe in resolutions...

Room for improvement.