It's March 1, which seems a good time to reassess those New Year's Resolutions (whether we believe in them or not) and check out progress.
As for mine...
I will...
-get a job. A real one, with health insurance. (Preferably in the first two months of the year.)
Not only did I get a job, I got three, and the two major ones were on the very last day of the second month of the year. Talk about bringing it down to the wire. None of them offer benefits, but I think I can take care of that. I would really enjoy the freedom of spraining my ankle or accidentally cutting myself in the kitchen and being able to go to the ER for that.
-buy new underwear, as has been so long since anyone saw my underwear, it is probably all out of style
As soon as I get that first paycheck, I'm going out on a true panty raid. I really think there is something to be said about underwear feng shui.
-find a way to tame the frizzies in my hair
Turns out it wasn't completely impossible (but I haven't yet gone through the southern summer). With a bit of a haircut, a combination of SunSilk anti-poof shampoo and captivating curl leave-in creme, (or straighten-up conditioner, a hair dryer and flat iron if I want to go straight) my hair actually looks pretty damn good. I know so because a hair snob friend of mine told me so, and she is brutally honest about that sort of thing.
-say yes to all date offers, no matter what my initial opinion of the offerer
I'm new in town, but now that I have employment and will soon have new panties, I will get started on this one ASAP.
I will not..
-have any imaginary boyfriend, but instead form a functional, two-sided relationship with a real member of the opposite sex (therefore having a purpose for the new knickers)
I've been hanging out with my imaginary ex a lot, but it's strictly platonic on every possible level. Besides, in the year+ that I've been gone, he's become quite the social butterfly. I need him to expand my social circle.
-Spend hours analyzing the body language and the "hidden meaning" in the words spoken by eligible bachelors with Scarlet, but instead find various other topics to spend hours talking about, like, um... politics?
I think we're making excellent progress on this one.
-not get angry with mum when she asks me stupid questions like, "Have you changed your sheets lately?" as if I am an 8-year old incapable of taking care of myself, but instead use it as an opportunity to find my inner zen-like qualities
Moving to a different state definitely improved this one drastically.
-judge eligible bachelors by the number of tattoos or holes in their bodies, academic credentials, political beliefs, or their baseball team of choice, but rather be open and simply grit my teeth while they list all the reasons why Derek Jeter is a "true Yankee."
This is still a work in progress, but thanks to A-Rod, Jeter has not had a chance to annoy me at all this spring. Progress!
2 comments:
I admit I had to look up our resolutions post, to see what my resolutions actually were.
-Graduate: still working on that one
-Learn to play the guitar: I was doing well but I admit I haven't touched it in close to a month. I vow to do better
-Meet friends outside of work: done very well with that one so far
-Not have any imaginary relationships: I believe I haven't committed this crime yet but I may be getting dangerously close to the edge. I vow to be real.
I will not…
- Sulk about having nothing to do, but instead make more friends in my local area so that my social schedule is full. ->Check!
- Let my singleton status prevent me from going on a proper holiday. -> Waiting for warmer weather.
- Accept male fuckwittage silently, but instead address fuckwittage in a mature and composed manner. ->I have not yet been subjected to male fuckwittage this year but you will hear if it happens.
- Have unrealistic expectations about men. ->I think I'm doing well with this one.
- Have a tantrum when my father indicates that I am to blame for my singleton status, but rather discuss the topic like a mature adult. Representing the rights of all singletons! ->I think that he is afriad to bring it up so I haven't been tested thus far.
- Settle on a man simply get my father to stop complaining about how he will never have grandchildren. ->More of a longterm goal.
I will…
- Go on a second date.->Last week with a third date on the horizon. Hoorah!
- Form a stable relationship with a male of the non-fuckwit variety. -> The world wasn't built in a day.
- Actively pursue new job opportunities in which I will not dread going to work everyday. ->I applied to a couple of jobs but grown used to rejection.
- Be happy for my non-singleton friends but not hesitate to object to smug married comments from friends and family. ->I think I'm doing well with this one.
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