Letting Yourself be Chased

The following comes to us from guest blogger Fenella. Please excuse her British spellings ;)

After analysing my recent break-up from every single angle possible and then every past relationship/potential relationship/I really wish he'd have noticed me non-existent relationship I came to the conclusion that with all the aforementioned I have been the chaser and not the chasee. My chasing hasn't been desperate, pathetic or cringey but I have been the one to make the first move or send the first text. And it's fair to say that method hasn't really worked out for me. So I came to the conclusion that I would no longer do the chasing. From now on I'm going to sit back, relax, be nonchalant and let the guys chase me. However, guys being guys you have to give them something to work with, so obviously I would still have to register my interest with them (hair flicking, meaningful glances, etc.) and give them my number if they ask for it, that sort of thing. But after that, my work would be finished. Then it's up to them to make the first move, send the first text, or buy the first drink...
I put my steely new resolution to the test the other night. My friend and I were out to dinner and I was pleasantly surprised to see a very attractive (Spanish) waiter serving tables near us. Luckily my friend's boyfriend is the manager so my friend knew all the waiting staff including said cute waiter. I thought this would work in my favour, and it did. He came over quite frequently, laughed and joked (flicked my hair) and I even managed to slip into the conversation that I speak a smattering of Spanish. Surely, I thought, I've got him hooked. And when I came back to the bathroom to discover that he'd asked my friend if I was single I was waiting for him to ask for my number. But he didn't. Instead, I was left wondering why he didn't and what had I done wrong and generally feeling pretty despondent and low in the self-esteem department. Which was exactly how I felt when I was the chaser. Which leads me to the conclusion that the only benefit of being the chasee is that you don't embarrass yourself with drunken texts. So now, instead of thinking my new resolution is going to lead me to become a steely ice-queen with the attitude of 'if a guy really wants to call you, he'll call you' I've ended up obsessing why a guy who I thought was clearly interested didn't even ask for my number. You just never can win.
But I'm over the Spanish waiter, he was too short for me anyway.