It was during a recent conversation with Scarlet that I realized we really need to cover our bases. Scarlet and I both had different ideas as to what, exactly, constituted getting to third base. A quick look at the urban dictionary didn't really help, since it produced 14 definitions. First and second seem to be pretty clear: kissing (with tongue) and grabbing a feel. But if you ask me, that still seems to leave a lot of uncharted territory between second base and scoring. A few of the urban definitions suggested getting to third as oral sex, but doesn't that seem like a pretty big jump from having your boob grabbed? Maybe I'm just out of the loop, but it seems more likely that teenagers today are simply much more desensitized about oral sex. Actually, if what I've seen on Oprah is true, oral sex could almost be first base. I guess the kissing (with tongue) is a mere sacrifice fly. It won't raise your batting average, but it will get you some pats on the back in the dugout.
If first base is kissing (with tongue), and second is above-the-belt feeling, it seems that an advancement of 90 feet would be anything below the belt. Just like in baseball, I don't really think any more bases need to be covered. If you can acquire a venereal disease, you've scored. That may be old-fashioned, but I also believe they should do away with the DH. I'm a purist.
2 comments:
I'm gonna say that since we're not preteens, we don't actually need to use this language. We're big girls, we can say what we actually did, not to brag about it, but not be embarrassed by it either. Or we can just go by the old standby and say "hooked up" which could mean anything or everything.
Valid point, but may I just point out that we love Twilight and High School Musical. Just sayin'...
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